Market: I am 6 today

Here in the ‘exciting’ world of journalism, we love a good pun. It makes us feel oh so clever to utilise word play, and dammit we think we’re funny. So rule one when choosing a name for your venue: make sure it’s something we can make crap headlines about and giggle about later on the press floor.

Enter, the Market – followed by jokes like “aisle 3”, “bargain shoppers”, “check out”, “meat market”… in terms of marketing, it can’t be beat. And see, I’ve done it again – marketing. Genius. It’s this kind of adaptability that’s seen the club go from strength to strength since opening, allowing it to hit its sixth birthday on Saturday, November 19.

The Market was thrust into Melbourne’s clubbing landscape with the principals of presenting a world-class nightclub, raising the bar with sound, lighting and entertainment and booking world-class DJs and entertainers; with, of course, the base crowd to be gay. They definitely kicked ass with the base crowd part, I couldn’t name a single homo in this city who hasn’t been to Market at least once. In their own words, “the venue presents a space where likeminded people can express themselves, and dance like no one is watching. Respect is paramount for all to enjoy: black, white, short, tall, gay, straight, bi, transgender, dress up, dress down. You can never be too cool. You can sprinkle baby powder on the dance floor.”

They totally lived up to their promises on opening night, by securing a performance from Ms Marcia Hines. Of course, there were your usual opening night mishaps, like the hydraulic stage not working properly so Marcia got stuck up there - but that’s a whole ‘nother story. Since then, the stage has lifted the likes of Loni Gordon, Christine Anu, Renee Geyer, Madison Ave, Joanne and Taylor; with the most recent being Inaya Day, who blew the roof off over Cup Weekend. There’s also been a huge contingency of non-performing celebrities through, from soap stars, singers, DJs, TV personalities, footballers and actors. But of course, the real stars each week are each and every one of you. See, I can be way cheesy when I want to be.

And there’ll be so many of you little stars there for their birthday, it’ll be a veritable galaxy. Kicking off at 10pm and charging through all the way til noon the next day, you’ll need to be a disco survivor to last the whole stretch. Helping you along for the ride will be very special guest, Tina Cousins.

Tina performed at the Market earlier this year, and it just so happens that she’ll be in town for their night of celebrations. Anyone who was there for her last performance knows that she totally had the crowd in her hands thanks to her electric performance, and she’s set to top that for their birthday. Also on the night there’ll be a spectacular show from Zowie Knox, full room dÈcor and DJs Queen Martine, Tony Svehla and Carmine Romano pulling out their best tracks.

So c’mon shoppers, head on down to the birthday aisle at the Market for a great mix of people bargain hunting while the club showcases it wares to the buying public.