But bless ‘em, they’re only young –in the lead up to Christmas, Minus18 (www.minus18.org) will be celebrating Easter. Seems they got the death and birth of ‘young baby cheeses’ all mixed up on their Sunday morning board meeting. Oh to be innocent again and under 18 again – but for those who are, they’ll be bringing resident DJs Mark, Jimi and Kizza along for the party at an as-yet unconfirmed venue, so all is forgiven. Check their website for updates on location.

Of course, the big party of November was the 6^th birthday celebrations at the Market (www.markethotel.com.au). They’re not slowing down through December either, with the Glamourhead Sharks fundraiser on December 8 – a fashion street wear and swimwear parade with all proceeds going to the Gay and Lesbian Switchboard and Glamourhead Sharks. They’re then trading as normal every day through Christmas and New Years for your clubbing delectation.

Just down the road at Xchange (www.xchange.com.au) it’ll be hoe hoe hoe as Candee Clause squeezes down the chimney to find out if you’ve been naughty or nice on December 20 – plus get your photo taken for a nominal fee and you’ll get the smug satisfaction of knowing you’ve chipped in to buy Christmas presents for the patients in Fairfield House at the Alfred Hospital.

The big party of New Years will be Raw Hide (www.rawhide.com.au) @ the new Chasers (the old ZOS which was the old Chasers) – they caned us for Cup Weekend, and they’re back for a New Years serving. The awesome thing is that while Raw Hides are usually a daytime affair, this party kicks off at 9:30pm and goes through til 7am the next morning. Of course, the usual crew being the day party set, they know how to keep going and going and going – so the recovery picks up the next morning at Motel in South Melbourne and carries through the whole day. I’m pretty sure if these guys could, they’d party the whole way through 2006 - if it weren’t for the whole work / eat / sleep / money ‘thing’.

And it’s fairly safe to say the biggest party of the New Year will be Locker Room (www.lockerroom.com.au), who are taking over the lower level of Club Evolution on January 1 (New Years Day night, if you don’t find that too confusing). The totally new room will have improved sound and lighting, and confirmed DJs JoJo (Frisky), Ruby (Sydney) and Peter Mac (Melb) will join a still to be announced special guest for a rocking night with some of the sexiest boys you’ve seen.

Hot on the heels of their Jamiroqui party in November comes ‘I’m dreaming of a Wonderland Christmas’ from (drumroll) Wonderland – which’ll be closed on its usual Friday night on December 23 and 30, instead opening on Christmas Day (Sunday) with plenty of Santas Lil Helpers. Also kickin’ it for the festive season will be Flip It @ Peel (www.thepeel.com.au) on Christmas Day, with PST going all out with their new ‘Ho Ho Whore’ show featuring Pussy Clause with her merry elves and special guest Sue Ridge, the red-nosed reinqueer – and of course Shawn King on the decks. Then the following Sunday, New Years Day, we’re warned to expect the unexpected with a huge sea monster in the human fish tank (Miss Jane?). Flip it all the way!

If you like your parties a little bit on the alternative side, you haven’t been forgotten or neglected, like your poor mother. Hot on the heels of Q&A’s 10^th birthday in November (hurrah) we have two killer parties for the New Year: firstly on New Years Eve it’s the White Party from Witness Protection Program Social Club (www.wppsc.com) @ The Public Office. Dust off those angel wings, the Miami circuit has been re-routed and is hitting Melbourne for NYE – sort of. As they say, "this ain’t no National Front disco; feel free to interpret white as you will but please note white hoods are hard to dance in!". Those crazy pranksters. Entertainment will be supplied by The White Hot Dancers and tunes will be courtesy of OSS (UK), Frosty, Mz Kung (Q&A) and Shaggs.

Punters will be pleased to follow that up with Spin Cycle (www.spincycle.com.au) Morning Fresh Edition @ The Commerical Hotel from 11am til 11pm on New Years Day, with a line up of DJs inside and outside in the beer garden including Mz Kung (Q+A), Dicko (Freakazoid, Wonderland) , Vinyl Richie (Rob Roy), and Merkin (Peel). That’s not to mention the huge line up Spin Cycle is bringing you every week throughout December, including a Royston Vasey Xmas special on December 24 – don’t miss it.